(Model essay) Sample IELTS response to an Academic exam question seen 4 February 2012 in Wollongong, Australia

Should young children be encouraged to follow a strict set of rules based on cultural tradition or should they be allowed to behave freely?  Discuss both and share your opinion.

The level of freedom children are allotted varies from one culture to another.  Among some, regimenting the behaviour of young children through strict traditional practice is thought to help them develop into skilled members of society.  Others argue the removal of strict household regulations allows young people to develop a free, inquisitive and creative mind.  Both points of view will be analyzed in this essay.

In one camp, raising children using a strict set of rules based on tradition is felt best.  For instance, in Japanese society often young children are taught how to properly conduct themselves in all social situations, including the manner in which they address elders, give and receive gifts and ask for favours.  As a result, Japanese society and the Japanese people are world renowned for their protocol, courtesy, attention to detail and charm.  As these are very positive qualities, it is clear that many benefits arise from the employment of a rigid parenting style.

On the other hand, however, many feel providing young people with freedom fuels their appetite for creativity.  American society, for example, is often mocked for its somewhat lax parenting structure.  Yet despite this, the United States was and continues to be home to the creation of some of the world’s most revolutionary products.  Thus, it is clear that freer parenting models pose numerous benefits.

After looking at both sides of this debate, I feel that a balance between protocol and free parenting structures should be sought after by guardians in the twenty-first century.  I expect this recipe to become more prevalent in the years to come.

 

About Ryan

I have been developing online IELTS training resources for over 10 years. For more information about me and how I can help your preparation for the IELTS, please email me: ryan@ieltsielts.com
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8 Responses to (Model essay) Sample IELTS response to an Academic exam question seen 4 February 2012 in Wollongong, Australia

  1. Amir Alrikaby says:

    Thank you very much Mr.Ryan that was really excellent respond you are always inspiring me,by the way..
    Could you please look at this essay I have given it today as followng:
    In order to be able to study well,students need an attractive,clean learning environment.universities and colleges should make efforts to provide this.
    Discuss

    Is it possible to write an argument style essay?and what will be the appropriate ideas
    Thank you alot Ryan please i need your kind respond

    • Ryan says:

      @Amir I think it would be difficult to write an argument essay response to that question as the question itself says ‘discuss’.

  2. Radmila says:

    Hello Ryan,
    Thank you very much for the superb essay, as usual , though! I am always appy to receive notifications on my e-mail, that you have written a new Model essay. A lot of new useful words to learn!

    Can you please explain the meaning of the connective word “in one camp”? Isn’t is an idiomatic expression? It is the first time I see it. And in what situations can we use it?

    Why have you written “ask FOR favours”? I thought that ask a favour is more appropriate. Or we can use both, cannot we?

  3. AL-Saadi says:

    Dear Sir

    Thank you very much for all your help. Would you mind telling us if we can write a sentence with more than 25 words as you did in this essay?

    “For instance, in Japanese society often young children are taught how to properly conduct themselves in all social situations, including the manner in which they address elders, give and receive gifts and ask for favours.” (35 words)

    Kind regards

    AL-Saadi

    • Ryan says:

      @AL-Saadi Yes, as long as your sentence is grammatically correct. However, if you are new to essay writing, I would suggest keeping sentences short until your grammar strengthens.

  4. Radmila says:

    Hello Ryan,
    Thank you very much for the superb essay, as usual , though! I am always appy to receive notifications on my e-mail, that you have written a new Model essay. A lot of new useful words to learn!

    Can you please explain the meaning of the connective word “in one camp”? Isn’t is an idiomatic expression? It is the first time I see it. And in what situations can we use it?

    Why have you written “ask FOR favours”? I thought that ask a favour is more appropriate. Or we can use both, cannot we?

    • Ryan says:

      @Radmila ‘In one camp’ is no different than saying ‘on the one hand’. It just refers to a specific point of view. Either ‘ask for favours’ or ‘ask a favour’ could be used.

  5. AKainat says:

    this same essay is appeared today(IELTS Academic module) in Hyderabad, pakistan

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